Typical marital conversation.

by ggeurs

Last night my wife and I were driving home and she made a comment to me (she had made it before and I didn’t remember her saying it).  I laughed and acknowledged that her comment was funny.  Then she reminded me that she had told me this once before; I told her I never remember having heard her say that.  Then she drops the line: “I am now convinced that you just don’t listen.”

I have one of two options, and neither of them are winners:

1.  I say, “You’re right, I don’t.”  This is a problematic response because if I say that, then it simultaneously affirms and disproves what she said.  If I don’t listen, then that would explain why I didn’t hear the story the first time I hear it.  But by saying, “You’re right, I don’t”, I am actually proving that I do listen because I am responding to the thing she just said out loud.

2.  I say, “Yes, I do.”  This acknowledges that I listen because I am hearing the words that she says, but reveals a potentially deeper problem.  Either my memory/perceptions are dodgy; or I have become lax at taking the things my wife says to heart.  Which is not the case (unless it’s about money or home renovation; two things I know that as a married couple we have to talk about but I don’t enjoy talking about).

Fortunately for me, I went with a third option which worked out well to my wife’s accusation:

“What’d you say?”